New Essay on The Zompist: 'On Arguing'

[nemorathwald]

Is there a lull in flamewars, or am I just not on the right forums anymore? Summer time, and the living is easy. So I choose now to post this. There's very little point in pointing out essays like this to anyone who is currently hunkered down in a fortress of defensiveness. They'd just feel you're making up rules to impose; and will promptly ask who died and made you king.

There is a new essay by Mark Rosenfelder on The Zompist, "On Arguing." Even if you're conflict-averse, you will see arguing in your life. If it turns ugly, "On Arguing" will help you judge the appropriate levels of social consequences to mete out for what you had to sit through.

Sample: "It’s the exaggeration and the malice that distinguish a real straw man from an honest misunderstanding."

Another useful essay on this topic is "How to Disagree" by Paul Graham.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Meh. People give so little effort to understanding that when you are misunderstood the best response may be to forget about it.

I've found that, even in a professional environment where the recipient is supposed to take it seriously, if I ask two questions I'll get an answer to one of them. If I make two points, only one of them will get noticed. Best case.

So, with so little effort going into understanding, even when it's important, how can you possibly expect argumentative discourse to be fully understood?

I was unclear? Maybe. But it's not unlikely that being exhaustively clear would be pointless. Legal precision in an internet argument? Not from me.

In my old age I've adopted a new internet arguing tactic. I make my point once, spending only as much time as is appropriate being precise. I accept there will be some who won't understand, and there will be sociopaths that will intentionally distort what I said because it's easier to argue against words they put in my mouth rather than the words that actually came from my mouth. But the strategy is to not care enough to waste my time. Some people simply *must* be right, and I've never seen an argument "won".

Have you ever seen an internet argument end with, "Oh, I guess you're right!"?

I'm not waiting for it.

[atdt1991.livejournal.com]

I have seen people say that, yes. It's even come out of my own fingers. *grin*

I suppose I have more patience in those circumstances. I care more about being clearly understood, when possible, than in agreement. I'm pretty cool with having an argument where I don't expect to change minds, but perhaps that's because I enjoy debate more than the average person.

[http://users.livejournal.com/jer_/]

Have you ever seen an internet argument end with, "Oh, I guess you're right!"?

No, but I've seen several that ended with "I stand corrected" or some version of "you make a good point, but I still disagree"

[matt-arnold.livejournal.com]

What? I don't understand you. I wasn't listening.