The Post-Rapture Post

[nemorathwald]

Just write your letter and it will be hand-delivered immediately following the exodus of the pure from the Earth. But you must be thinking to yourself, "How can the letters be delivered after the Rapture?" The answer is simple. The creators of this site are Atheists. That's right, we don't believe in God. How else would we be able to deliver your correspondence after the Rapture?

Yes, I went to the order form, and it appears that they are seriously taking money for this through Paypal. Actually delivering the letters would cost a lot of the money (if any) they're earning from this service. As funny and farcical as this site is, they need to set aside enough of their earnings (if any) in highly liquid safe slow-growth investments sufficient that they would be able to carry through on their promise, despite the certainty that they will not have to carry through on it.

If I promise to mail customers an umbrella in the event of worldwide inundation by flying pigs, and have no plan in place to gain the means to purchase said umbrellas, that means I do not intend to do it even if it happens. That would be fraud. The fact that we will never see the aforementioned porcine blitzkrieg would not make the earnings any less fraudulent.

But if they truly have a workable plan in place for the impossible, they are acting in good faith based on the beliefs of those who are losing out through this transaction and sincerely wish to do so. Casinos are no worse. For this, I toast the Post-Rapture Post.

Comments

[paranthropus.livejournal.com]

Brilliant! This is the funniest thing I've seen all week.

The $7.99 "Keep your chin up" postcard is especially delightful.

[phecda.livejournal.com]

As funny and farcical as this site is, they need to set aside enough of their earnings (if any) in highly liquid safe slow-growth investments sufficient that they would be able to carry through on their promise, despite the certainty that they will not have to carry through on it.

Unlike the Catholic Church selling indulgences to get you into Heaven, which has a pretty much 100% guarantee that no one was ever going to come back to complain...

*bows very deeply*

[dawnwolf.livejournal.com]

I have never, ever seen the words, "porcine blitzkrieg" together in a sentence before.

I doubt I ever will again.

Bravo!

[http://users.livejournal.com/jer_/]

This is fantastic, if for no other reason than the graphic. You could have printed an excerpt from the Yellow Pages next to it, the graphic is worth it! :)